Valentine’s Day Jokes One Liners

And in her smile I see something more beautiful than the stars.

Do you love me because I am beautiful or I am I beautiful because you love me?

Valentine's Day Jokes for married, couples and singles: Funny One ... | Funny  valentines day quotes, Funny one liners, Single quotes funny

If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?

What would you call a woman who goes out with You? Desperate!

Do skunks celebrate Valentine’s Day? Sure, they’re very scent-imental!

How did the telephone propose to his girlfriend? He gave her a ring.

What’s the best part about Valentine’s Day? The day after when all the chocolate goes on sale.

Funny Valentine's Day Quotes about Being Single

What did the boy bird say to the girl bird on Valentine’s Day? Let me call you Tweet heart!

If it is not Valentines day and you see a man in a flower shop, you can probably start up a conversation by asking, ‘What did you do?’

What do squirrels give for Valentine’s Day? Forget-me-nuts.

What did the painter say to her boyfriend? “I love you with all my art!”

Why is Valentine’s Day the best day for a celebration? Because you can really party hearty!

Grocery store flowers on Valentine’s Day: show someone you care slightly more than not at all.

Get married early in the morning. That way, if it doesn’t work out, you haven’t wasted a whole day.

I didn’t know angels could fly so low.

I’m gonna spend Valentine ‘s Day with my ex… Box 360.

Why didn’t Cupid shoot his arrow at the lawyer’s heart? Because even Cupid can’t hit a target that small.

What is a vampire’s sweetheart called? His ghoul-friend.

What did the light bulb say to the switch? “You turn me on.”

Dear men, “I don’t want anything for Valentine’s Day” is the same as “I’m fine.” You’re welcome.

I can’t wait for Valentine’s Day because I get to make cupcakes for a special someone and that special someone is me.

Why did the cannibal break up with his girlfriend? She didn’t suit his taste!

What did the paper clip say to the magnet? I find you very attractive.

What is the true purpose of Valentine’s Day? To remind single people they are single.

What do single people call Valentine’s Day? Happy Independence Day!

For Valentines Day I have been contemplating my current and past relationships. I organized the data and plotted it using an Ex-Axis and a Why-Axis.

Why is lettuce the most loving vegetable? Because it’s all heart.

What kind of flowers do you never give on Valentine’s Day? Cauliflowers!

What happened when the man fell in love with his garden? It made him wed his plants!

What did the stamp say to the envelope on Valentine’s Day? “I’m stuck on you!”

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