Funny Happy New Year Wishes & Quotes

If you’re known as the comedian in the friend group, try these funny Happy New Year wishes to share. Once you’ve got the whole group laughing, toast to another year of fond memories and fun!

  1. Here’s to a new year doing the same old habits.
  2. A New Year’s resolution is something that goes in one year and out the other.
  3. Last year’s resolution was to lose 20 pounds by Christmas. Only 30 pounds to go.
  4. Remember when we were young and wanted to stay up for New Year’s? Now we’re old and all we want to do is sleep.
  5. Many people look forward to the New Year for a new start on old habits.
  6. May the New Year bring you significantly more joy than the holidays did.
  7. Happy New Year! Let’s eat, drink, and be merry — for tomorrow we diet!
  8. All I wish this new eve comes with a lot of joys for you since you look ugly while crying. Happy New Year!
  9. May this New Year bring actual change in you, nor recurrence of old habits in a new package.
  10. I think I made too many New Year’s resolutions this year. It took me almost a full day to break them all.
  11. “An optimist stays up till midnight to see the New Year in. A pessimist stays up to make sure the old year leaves.” – Bill Vaughn
  12. “May all your troubles last as long as your New Year’s resolutions.” – Joey Adams
  13. “First you take a drink, then the drink takes a drink, then the drink takes you.” – F. Scott Fitzgerald
  14. “Now there are more overweight people in America than average-weight people. So overweight people are now average…which means, you have met your New Year’s resolution.” – Jay Leno
  15. “Good resolutions are simply checks that men draw on a bank where they have no account.” – Oscar Wilde
  16. “What the new year brings to you will depend a great deal on what you bring to the new year.” – Vern McLellan

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