- “Everyone has an opinion on how long it takes to recover from a breakup.”
— Ted Mosby, How I Met Your Mother, Season 4: The Naked Man
- “I wound up shame-eating the whole pizza. I woke up all greasy and sweaty. My sheets looked like what they wrap deli sandwiches in. Maybe I should join a gym. Do you go to a gym?”
— Ted Mosby, How I Met Your Mother, Season 3: The Yips
- “We’re going to get older whether we like it or not, so the only question is whether we get on with our lives, or desperately cling to the past.”
— Ted Mosby, How I Met Your Mother, Season 4: Intervention
- “If you’re not scared then you’re not taking a chance. And if you’re not taking a chance, then what the hell are you doing anyway?”
— Ted Mosby, How I Met Your Mother, Season 5: The Window
- “There are a lot of little reasons why the big things in our lives happen.”
— Ted Mosby, How I Met Your Mother, Season 4: Right Place, Right Time
- “There are two big days in any love story: the day you meet the girl of your dreams and the day you marry her.”
— Ted Mosby, How I Met Your Mother, Season 6: Big Days
- “You can’t cling to the past. Because no matter how tightly you hold on, it’s already gone.”
— Ted Mosby, How I Met Your Mother, How I Met Your Mother Season 8: Something Old
- “Nothing good happens after 2:00 am… when 2:00 am rolls around, just go home and go to sleep.”
— Ted Mosby, How I Met Your Mother, Season 1: Nothing Good Happens After 2 A.M.
- “The littlest thing can cause a ripple effect that changes your life.”
— Ted Mosby, How I Met Your Mother, Season 2: Lucky Penny
- “It’s kind of insane how much happened in just a day and a half.”
— Ted Mosby, How I Met Your Mother, Season 9: Daisy
- “Whether a gesture’s charming or alarming, depends on how it’s received.”
— Ted Mosby, How I Met Your Mother, How I Met Your Mother Season 8: The Final Page
- “Because sometimes even if you know how something’s gonna end that doesn’t mean you can’t enjoy the ride.”
— Ted Mosby, How I Met Your Mother, Season 2: Monday Night Football
- “Shouldn’t we hold out for the person who doesn’t just tolerate our little quirks but actually kinda likes them?”
— Ted Mosby, How I Met Your Mother, Season 5: Double Date
- “You will be shocked, kids, when you discover how easy it is in life to part ways with people forever. That’s why, when you find someone you want to keep around, you do something about it.”
— Ted Mosby, How I Met Your Mother, Season 9: Gary Blauman
- “She walks down the aisle. You say your vows, you go to the reception, you have your first dance. Before you know it, just like magic, you realize, it’s a perfect fit.”
— Ted Mosby, How I Met Your Mother, Season 9: Vesuvius
- “But that’s the funny thing about destiny: it happens whether you plan it or not. It turns out I was just too close to the puzzle to see the picture that was forming.”
— Ted Mosby, How I Met Your Mother, Season 1: Pilot
- “People make fun of the guy who stays home every night doing nothing, but the truth is that guy is a genius.”
— Ted Mosby, How I Met Your Mother, Season 7: Now We’re Even!
- “I used to be in such a hurry all the time. Everything was so urgent. Now I figured, if it’s going to happen it’ll happen when it happens. I’m not going anywhere, she’s not going anywhere. What’s the rush, right?”
— Ted Mosby, How I Met Your Mother, Season 9: Platonish
- “The more you fight it, the worse it’s gonna get. It’s like when your car slides on ice, you stir into the skid.”
— Ted Mosby, How I Met Your Mother, Season 6: Desperation Day
- “Kids, when you’re in a new relationship and you’re competing with your ex for who’s happier, it can get ugly.”
— Ted Mosby, How I Met Your Mother, How I Met Your Mother Season 8: Nannies
- “Some couples always support each other, and some couples always challenge each other. But is one really better than the other? Yes. Support is better. Way better.”
— Ted Mosby, How I Met Your Mother, Season 6: The Exploding Meatball Sub
- “I think for the most part if you’re really honest with yourself about what you want out of life, life gives it to you.”
— Ted Mosby, How I Met Your Mother, Season 2: Something Blue
- “We spend so much effort trying to keep parts of our lives hidden, even from our closest friends, that in those rare times when we do open up, it’s amazing how minor those secrets all end up being.”
— Ted Mosby, How I Met Your Mother, Season 1: Game Night
- “You may think your only choices are to swallow your anger or throw it in someone’s face, but there’s a third option: You can just let it go, and only when you do that is it really gone and you can move forward.”
— Ted Mosby, How I Met Your Mother, Season 4: Happily Ever After
- “That was the year I was left at the altar. The year I was beat up by a crazy bartender. The year I got fired. The year I got beat up by a goat, a girl goat at that. And dammit, if it wasn’t the best year of my life.”
— Ted Mosby, How I Met Your Mother, Season 4: The Leap
- “It’s like Descartes says, ‘In order to determine whether we can know anything with certainty, we first have to doubt everything we know.’”
— Ted Mosby, How I Met Your Mother, Season 3: How I Met Everyone Else
- “He may not fit society’s definition of a hero, but he is the hero I needed. The hero who helped me recover from the disaster of my failed almost-marriage and get back into the game. He lives in the shadows. Is he a dream? Truth? Fiction? Damnation? Salvation? He is all these things and none of them. He is…The Naked Man.”
— Ted Mosby, How I Met Your Mother, Season 4: The Naked Man
- “If you’re looking for the word that means caring about someone beyond all rationality and wanting them to have everything they want no matter how much it destroys you, it’s love. And when you love someone you don’t stop, ever. Even when people roll their eyes, and call you crazy. Even then. Especially then.”
— Ted Mosby, How I Met Your Mother, Season 9: Sunrise
- “I’m sorry, when I’m excited I abbreviate words I shouldn’t.”
— Ted Mosby, How I Met Your Mother, How I Met Your Mother Season 8: Lobster Crawl
- “We gotta wait for the real thing, no matter how tough it gets.”
— Ted Mosby, How I Met Your Mother, Season 7: The Rebound Girl
- “And that, kids, is how I met your mother.”
— Ted Mosby, How I Met Your Mother, Season 9: Gary Blauman
- “When you believe in people, people come through.”
— Ted Mosby, How I Met Your Mother, Season 9: Coming Back
- “Eight years ago I made an ass of myself chasing after you and I made an ass of myself chasing after you a bunch of times since then. I have no regrets because it led me to something I wouldn’t trade for the world, it led to you being my friend. So as your friend and a leading expert in the field of making an ass of yourself. I say to you, from the heart, get the hell out of this car.”
— Ted Mosby, How I Met Your Mother, How I Met Your Mother Season 8: The Final Page
- “You see, kids, right from the moment I met your mom I knew, I have to love this woman as much as I can, and as long as I can, and I can never stop loving her, not even for a second. I carried that lesson through every stupid fight we ever had, every 5 a.m. Christmas morning, every sleepy Sunday afternoon, every speed bump, every pang of jealousy or boredom or uncertainty that came our way. I carried that lesson with me.’”
— Ted Mosby, How I Met Your Mother, Season 9: Last Forever
- “The great moments of your life won’t necessarily be the things you do, they’ll also be the things that happen to you. Now, I’m not saying you can’t take action to affect the outcome of your life, you have to take action, and you will. But never forget that on any day, you can step out the front door and your whole life can change forever. You see, the universe has a plan, kids, and that plan is always in motion. A butterfly flaps its wings, and it starts to rain. It’s a scary thought, but it’s also kind of wonderful. All these little parts of the machine constantly working, making sure that you end up exactly where you’re supposed to be, exactly when you’re supposed to be there. The right place at the right time.”
— Ted Mosby, How I Met Your Mother, Season 4: Right Place, Right Time
Best Ted Mosby Quotes 2021
