Cheesy expressions of love are at the heart of Valentine’s Day. And yes, that pun is very much intended – and appropriate, given the “punny” humor of many Valentine’s messages.

Whether it’s printed on a greeting card or etched on a chalky piece of candy, a cornball saying has the ability to make you smile and groan at the same time. For some, they’re a cringeworthy part of the holiday to be avoided at all costs. For others, they’re a guilty pleasure – much like a big box of assorted chocolates you know you shouldn’t polish off in one sitting.

If you fall into the second group, here’s a collection of cheesy Valentine’s Day messages to sink your teeth into. Unlike that box of chocolates, they’re calorie-free. However, we can’t promise you won’t wind up with a stomachache after reading through these saccharine sayings.

Puns

Most cheesy Valentines include a word pun, often accompanied by a cartoon or other picture. Here are some “punny” examples.

• (Any Wild Animal) I’m WILD about you, Valentine.
• (Any Wild Animal) You drive me WILD.
• (Bee) You’re the BEE’S KNEES.
• (Car) You make my heart RACE.
• (Cat) You’re PURR-fect for me.
• (Dog) You’re DOGGONE cute!
• (Fox) You are one FOXY lady.
• (Lion) You’re adorable, and I ain’t LION.
• (Moon) You send me over the moon.
• (Playing Cards) You’re the [KING/QUEEN] of my heart.
• (Sheep) I love EWE from the bottom of my heart.
• (Socks) We make a fine PAIR.
• (Superhero) You’re my hero, Valentine.
• (Teddy Bear) Life without you would be un-BEAR-able.
• (Train) I CHOO-CHOO-choose you.
• For more ideas along these lines, see our list of love puns.

Candy & Snack Sayings

Another corny way to express your feelings is by sending the object of your affection a cute saying with candy or another snack item.

• (Any Candy) Sweets for my sweetie.
• (Any Candy) Nothing could be sweeter than being your Valentine.
• (Any Candy) Give me some sugar, baby.
• (Almond Joy) You bring JOY to my life.
• (Apple) You’re the APPLE of my eye.
• (Cheetos) I heard you like CHEESY Valentines.
• (Chocolate Covered Strawberries) I love you BERRY much.
• (Corn Nuts, Fritos) I heard you like CORNY Valentines.
• (Crush Soda) I’m CRUSHING on you.
• (Gum) I’m STICKING with you.
• (Gummy Worms) You’ve really WORMED your way into my heart.
• (Orange) ORANGE you glad we met?
• (Pop Rocks) You ROCK my world, Valentine.
• (Red Hots) I have the HOTS for you.
• (Starbursts) When I look in your eyes, I see STARBURSTS.
• If you want even more ideas, check out our king-sized list of candy bar sayings.

Pickup Lines

When you think about it, pickup lines are really just a more adult form of the goofy sayings on children’s Valentines. Of course, they tend to be a little more racy.

• Do you know first aid? Because Cupid just shot me straight through the heart.
• I sure hope my parachute opens, because I’m falling fast for you.
• When I saw you, I knew I was on the right track… because my heart was off and racing.
• The Surgeon General ought to put a warning on you, because you are smokin’ hot.
• You’re like a broken staircase. You make me go head over heels.
• I need a compass when I look at you, because I keep getting lost in your eyes.
• Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?
• Who needs chocolates when there’s eye candy like you around?
• If being sexy was a crime, you’d be on the Most Wanted List.
• Do you like photography? Because I’d love to take you to a darkroom and see what develops.
• I believe you stole something of mine – my heart.
• If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?
• Good thing I’m over 21, because your beauty is intoxicating.
• You must be a beaver, because all I think of when I see you is Dam!
• You make every day seem like Valentine’s Day.

Poems

The ultimate cheeseball way to express your love is through a poem. Here are some awesomely awful examples.

• Roses are red
  Violets are blue
  Tamales are hot
  And so are you
• Roses are red
  Violets are blue
  But they both turn green
  Out of envy for you
• Here’s a Valentine’s poem
  To make your heart glow
  I love you, my sweet
  Even more than you know
• I love you
  You love me
  Let’s get it on passionately
• Roses are red
  Violets are blue
  Here’s a cheesy Valentine
  Just for you